Lunch Floater

Yo Neill, sup dood? Like the header? Do you get it? It sounds like a piece of turd I left in the bowl at lunch. The funny part; THAT'S WHAT IT IS. Friggle facking fuck! Some days, fragnabbit, shit just does not work. Today was one of them.

So here's the fuggtastic fire fighting forestry robot. Pulls trees out of the way after they have been cut down. Some bullshit like that, originally it was the shoulder to a much bigger robot, but that illustration was NOT WORKING. I need a longer lunch...or more time at home. Something.

Luckily, my buddy Trevor shared this with me today. God bless you Trevor, from all of us. God bless you. Direct Link (or clip the pic dingleberries).
Hey, were you at Great Wolf? I missed you there...I know I said not to come, but I thought you would have read through that veiled attempt at sounding aloof. What gives? You missed a kick ass tattoo of a poorly drawn Mazda Miata on some guys belly (No, seriously, that part isn't a joke. It was amazing).

Well, have a good one. Better art coming soon!

Doug "Mandroid" Williams

Space Bot WIP

BBBBBBBBRRRRRRMMMMMMMNNNNNNNNNNNNNN! BRRRMNNNNN! BBRRRRRRMMMNNN! Hey Neill! Know what that sound was? A vuvuzela! The news is crazy for them. I actually think they sound cool, but I'm guessing to most I'm like a human version of a vuvuzela.

Anywho, quick robots today. Both unfinished. the orange feller was just for fun. He'll also have some wheels on his feet. You know...to go fast. Fuck, I don't know, he/she/it was fun to draw.

The soccer bot was for a goofy personal project. I decided my story-boarding portfolio is way old now. Been awhile since I've needed to do those. So I came up with an ad in my head for Nike. It has all these robots attacking a city, forming up together Destructicon style, and even a death ball sized soccer ball. Of course all these famous soccer (futbol and football for those of you...well...from anywhere else in the world) fight back and kick the shit out of them. Contrived? yes. So that was one of the mini balls.

I'll add more to both later. Goddamn shit is crazy lately. Heading to Great Wolf this weekend, so...see you there? We can go doubles on the tube slide, or you can watch my kids while my wife and I go. Actually, don't come, I need to work out a bit before you see me with my shirt off (oh, that will happen, that will happen). The rest of you there....sorry.

Doug 'Goin' to the Lodge' Williams

Lunch time space crash

Sup Neill. How's the program going? Remember, one at a time.

So, you might dig this, maybe not, but I've had a few people asking how I go about making lunchtime art. So, today I banged something out. I should spend longer on it, but it's was quick, and believe it or not, I have shit to do! Gawdamn I've been busy. It's not slowing Neill, It's not fucking slowing! Any way...steps...



I use a limited brush set and paint in Photoshop CS2 and Painter X. X, as in ten. That's it. Quick post today. Lunch is over...and I must work....

Doug Quick Post McDraw.

INTERVENTION!

Hey Neill. Man...I have to do something, something involving you. So I cranked out this piece at lunch so I could have a chat with you. Chat...I guess...well...shit...here goes...

Hey man.....psshhh....this is tough. I'm not sure how to say any of this....I think....I think you're taking on too much. I think your addicted to making films. Let me explain.

You made a great film. Right out of the gate. The rush and high must have been exhilarating. Now....I'm just saying....take it easy. Don't overdo it. this shit can kill you. See, I expect you to make another film; we all do; but three? It's too much at one time. Even Spielberg when he was on his full on film making binge in the eighties didn't take that much celluloid into his veins. Sure he produced, dabbled in some television work, but he didn't snort up three features at once. Don't deny it Neill; I been on the web.

Fine...you brought this on yourself.

Example 1: SECRET SCI-FI FLICK! The Hollywood Insider.

"It’s great news to hear that District 9 creator Neill Blomkamp has signed a deal with independent financier Media Rights Capital (MRC) for his next sci-fi movie. The bad news is that his next movie isn’t going to be District 10."

That is great news! I loved District 9. No, really I did. I'd love to see a District 10. I even have two fairly solid ideas how a sequel could play out (One's more solid than the other), and a third idea that merges the two. But I can't help but wonder if we need a District 10. I'd be the first in line if you made it (especially if it was based on my ideas), but what if there was just District 9. What if there never was an AVP. Trust me, those ideas are linked.

Example 2: DISTRICT 10! Market Saw

"DISTRICT 10 (Production title at least) is now in pre-production with filming to start in the October time frame this year. Shooting locations will be South Africa once again as well as New Zealand. There has been no word on whether it will be shot in S3D or not as of yet. You will be the first to know! Peter Jackson is again producing the sequel with Neill Blomkamp directing."

Oh! Ignore the above, you're making District 10! Fuck yeah! I think making two films at once is risky, but I bet you could pull it off. Sci-fi vs sci-fi. Maybe you could even share assets. I mean that shit is tight! Look at how secure the article is. PJ producing again! Right on! Is it going to be S3D seems to be the only real question (goodfuckingmuppets, I'm getting tired of everything needing to be in 3D). A little worried for your health...but you can probably pull off two flicks at once.

Example 3: THE FUCKING HOBBIT?!? CinemBlend

"The One Ring has picked up something from a spy who tells them that Neill Blomkamp is on board to direct The Hobbit. They haven’t been able to verify the rumor yet, but they seem pretty confident, and when it comes to Middle Earth, there’s no one better about getting this stuff right than them. "

By Gandalf's taint. Too much, too fucking much. Have you seen a middle earth movie? that shit takes time. You have to forge like a billion arrow points, and each has a fucking story on them. You can't make this your third. I mean, shit, you'd make a great Hobbit, but at the same time as your other two projects? Good fuck, no. You might as well hug Sauron's vagina eye and hope for the best. You're going to get burned!


So Neill, for your sake; slow down. 3 films at once is too much. I hated to be the one to have to tell you this, but all the warning signs were there, and somebody had to do something. Make one film for now, maybe a video or two. Rolling up three flciks at once is pure madness, and the street value of all that film could break the bank. Before you know it, you could be directing Money Tree and Sleep Country ads from an editing van down by the river. So, slow up. One at a time.

Your concerned friend;

Doug Williams

The Axe Man Cometh...

Yo Neill! Check it out! My office park is in the news!

We're on lock down. Can't leave the building. There's cops and everything. Even a chopper. The sketch above is who I think it is. I mean, I have no proof, just a guess. I'm also guessing he has debt issues.

Probably some whacked out stalker freak. Probably has a blog, but there's nothing on it but a one sided conversation and wild tangent rants. Know what I mean? Hello? Hellllllooo?

Oh well, I'm going to get some lunch. Fuck the lock down, I'm hungry.

Ha ha, lookit that guy. Nice hockey mask dumbass! You're on the wrong side of the border douche! How about I give you a slapshot to the--OH SHIT!

Doug Ass and Elbows Williams

Pchow Pchow!

Neill! Sup' homey? Things going well? Sorry I've been away from the blog. Crazy work/family time . School's wrapping up and my baby is going to be a first grader! It's insane. They're really growing. I'm going to put them in tupperware containers to slow it down.

I took on a bunch of projects at once....and now am playing catch up. They are all awesome though, and all learning experiences. What is the opposite for the phrase "When it rains it pours"? You know, when it's positive. When it suns...it sunn-i-ers...it burns? Shit, I don't know. It's all super great is what I'm trying to say.

Getting back to normal now though. I almost didn't post today; I have a copy of Left 4 Dead I've been meaning to play since Christmas. I was going to do that, but noticed that a few hundred more people were looking at this blog per day than just a few weeks ago. Wha' happened? How'd they find us? So I figured, I could crank something out and post it at lunch...which is over in three minutes.

Basically an old tank in some bombed out future shitty city. I mashed photo's of soviet tanks and a hind on top of each other, and brought out the mech shape from that. Super quick and dirty. That's it. Minutes left...uh....what can I talk about...um.....gee...OH!

Hey, how come asparagus can taste so good (grilled with a tad bit of salt) but make your pee smell so bad. I mean SO BAD. I ate a lot of asparagus last night. Now I'm embarrassed to pee in the restroom. IT STINKS!

Time!

Have a good one;

Doug peestinker Williams

Eff U BP

Yo, yo, yo! What's up Neill? Shit, been awhile. I just have been crazy busy. Good busy, just busy. You know, you get it.

So at lunch today I was fuming. Look at this fucker.

Can you believe that shit? 'I would like my life back'? Really? I can think of 11 oil rig workers and their families that would really like to get their lives back. You cunt stick fucker. You pile of shit. Are you really that tone deaf? Are you that fucking dumb? If you're just evil; like cartoony evil; well then shit, I'm sorry.

So what to do with you guys. I have an idea. Don't worry, I'm not someone who thinks you should be killed or anything. I don't know you. As much as your company is making my skin crawl; maybe you guys in person are not so bad. I don't know. My guess is that you punt puppy's into a turbine to blow off steam; but shit, I don't know. Still, you can't walk away from this scott free. I think we should use the letters B and P to figure out your punishment.

At first, I thought Butt Plugs. But there's plenty of people who actually enjoy those. I mean they make them for a reason, right? Then I thought Bubonic Plague, but that goes to the whole killing thing I'm not really into. But then...it came to me. Two simple words that equal a lot of discomfort.

Butt Pigeons.

We'll launch a Butt Pigeon a day into your anus'..anus's...shit where does that apostrophe go...at any rate you're all getting pigeons up your butt. Now inserting the air cannon to launch the pigeon into your rectum probably won't be too fun, but I'm guessing the pigeon scrambling to crawl out of your anus will be even less enjoyable. Then again, I don't know you. Maybe you'll dig this it.

So fuck you, dickwad.

Shit! Neill, dude, I'm so sorry. this should be an e-mail to you but instead went to Tony "BP" Cuntwad Fucker. I think that's his name. Sorry man, next one is for you I swear. No but pigeons.

And to Tony; I genuinely hope that you are a better person than you seem to be on video. For my hopes and beliefs into the whole human race, I hope you're better than you seem to be. Honestly.

Doug